Focus

I never did work out and this week because of continued jet lag. This week felt really long and I thought to just take it easy. This weekend I feel somewhat back to normal except my eating habits could be better. All part of rest and recuperation. Now that I’m writing, I realize I haven’t eaten fast food in so long! Well, consistently I mean. I stopped by Taco Bell on the way home from my trip because I was REALLY tired then.

I somehow have lost 10 pounds. My goal is to lose another 5 in this next month (end of May) to make a total of 15 pounds! Friends have commented that I look like I have lost weight. I honestly attribute this to the lack of drinking. When I drank, I felt heavy and would not eat the best. I also felt lazy and depressed. I feel great now!

Since I’m just back from a 10 day vacation, I really want to save save save! I have a baseline savings and really want that to grow. I feel like I still do a lot of right now as opposed to future me. I’m trying so hard to not spend on my credit card and want to make that my goal for the month of May. Don’t spend on the credit card. I get gas on it because of the return, but I don’t think I’ll do that this month. A monthly credit card cleanse! I really think I charge too much on it without deducting from my earnings. I also pay it off every month (no matter the damage) and then think, “Hmm could have paid myself.” Then I get a little…A LOT disgusted with myself because I did that cycle over again.

I am enjoying losing weight, saving, and traveling. All of these things I have to remember that I am doing slowly to learn and grow in each department. I can’t build it in a day and I think the slow process is helping me realize more fully some of the mistakes I’m making along the way. I’d rather be consciously aware of my spending habits and really thinking about the way I can change them as opposed to mindless spending…trying to move away from that!

Happy New Year! 

I was so busy with getting repairs finished on my vehicle yesterday that I didn’t write a “Happy New Year” blog. I also missed the Steelers vs Browns game. 😤
I’ve been really tempted to purchase a new car, but I’m not ready for that kind of commitment. As is the case already, I’m a pretty big commitment phobe. The current lack of car payment is what allows me to travel more. So, I spent a couple hundred dollars (and my mom gifted me with some cash) fixing my car. Personally, I think it sounds and runs better! Thanks to the honest mechanic! I have a new goal with this car which may be met this year…300,000 miles. Spending a thousand or so dollars each year is still better than a 2+ year lease or a five year payment commitment for a new car. I take time to remind myself of this during times of frustration!
Last night I had In-N-Out because it’s amazing. Since I’m home, my mother treated me to the double double mustard fried (pickles are okay) onion add chopped chilis burger – in case you wanted to know the BEST way to eat an In-N-Out burger 😉. It was then that I thought about the past year whilst in my minor food coma…
I thought about how it took me six months to really change some maladaptive behaviors last year: to learn how to really say no (and reflect on why I felt the need to say “yes”), to learn how to have a shit ton of patience, to learn that self-care is way more important than pleasing others, and that people who want to be in your life will always let you know by way of actions – otherwise it’s best not to bother.
These all didn’t come into awareness in 365 days. Most of them were lingering over the years, but somehow I gained further awareness last year in how to stop feeding them. Every now and then I’ll snack on the past but not entertain the idea over dinner and certainly will not get into a full blown food coma over it <- I’m not sure of this analogy. Anyway, the point is that fruition comes when it comes and better that in the long run than trying to press for something to just “click”.
I’m spending 2017 completely sober of alcohol. Why? Well, I just feel like having this year be completely free of any convolution. In the aforementioned lessons learned, I know I reached those conclusions because of a new found conscious awareness. So, my goal is to be as consciously aware as possible. Haters gonna hate too!
I’m about to look for my first 5K of 2017. I didn’t run in December because I was traveling so much. I’ve also taken measurements and weight of my body because that’s going to be intresting to see how that’s going to change. I didn’t work out yesterday and I probably won’t today. Oh well. Remember the long term and not the right now.
I wrote my first journal entry of 2017 last night and it was short. Just a little chronicle of where my mind was at last night = sufficient.
Next up…a piece on budget breakdown.